Mark's an eyebrow amateur, Chris is a 95% straight gay and we'll miss Toya
We’re three weeks into the latest series of Big Brother, which means there’s probably only another 25 weeks of it to go or something.
They’ll probably mix things up by chucking another dozen housemates in next week and make them all fight for the beds.
Those who miss out can sleep in holes that they’ve had to dig themselves with tea spoons.
Here’s hoping. But for now, there’s plenty going on, and last night saw the eviction of Toya A Washington , which will make the house that little bit duller.
But what else did we learn? Here’s half a dozen valuable lessons from the eviction night show…
1. There's something massively shoddy about this current series.
Twerking challenges? Horror omlettes? TWERKING?
It seems to be all about bunging a combustible bunch of personalities into the house and letting them scrap it out.
Give them all mouth gags, blinkers and a 500-piece jigsaw each and we can all relax watching them try to get to grips with it.
2. Chris thinks he came out despite being 95% straight
Nice guy Chris R Wright tried to come out of the closet a bit in spite of the fact that he doesn't really seem to fancy blokes.
He’s never had a gay experience but sometimes sees men who he finds a bit attractive.
Right. Whatever, mate. You're confused about being confused.
3. Steven might be the house intellectual
Why were the rest of the housemates indulging Steven Goode during his made-up word task?
Why didn't one of them say, 'you're doing a task here, aren't you mate?'
The joke was on Steven in the end, as he had to scoff some barely-edible alphabet letters. Eat your words.
4. Helen remains oblivious to her many failings
She was NOT happy with being accused of being a backstabber, regarding her relationship with Danielle.
Rude, unfeeling, insensitive, brash? Yeah, maybe.
But at least she'll be all of those things to your face. Never to your back.
5. Mark's a one trick eyebrow-shaping pony
Poor Jale was wandering around with a look of permanent surprise on her face thanks to Mark Byron's eyebrow meddling.
Maybe we’ll see the establishment of a brand new dynamic in the house soon.
Perhaps a new, dominant tribe will emerge - one consisting of people who have had their eyebrows sculpted by Mark.
Are you Team Eyebrows or not...?
6. Toya will be missed
The departed housemate was far too bright and multi-dimensional to have been evicted this early, and it's a bit of a loss.
Unfortunately, she doesn't suffer fools gladly, and if there's one thing this house isn't lacking in, it's fools.
It's one less dissenting voice to shout down the egotistical monsters – hopefully they won't grow even stronger now.
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